Living alone sucks.

Ever since I came back from Saudi Arabia to go to college here in Egypt, life has changed a lot. I always thought living alone would be all cool and easier but it didn't turn out to be that way at all.

I moved to Egypt three years ago to come continue my studies here. I wasn't excited about coming here at all but when I did it didn't end up being so bad. I lived with my brother for the first year and a half until he finished studying fine arts and moved back to Saudi Arabia to find himself a Job. He left me all alone. I have nobody here but my puppy, named "Pootshi". 

Pootshi has become my everything ever since I got him as a gift for my birthday first year I came to Egypt. He is my dad, my brother, my boyfriend or better to say he was and is family to me, but enough about Pootshi for now.

Life is so hard right now on me since I am "the man of the house". I do everything around here. I do grocery shopping, I pay the bills, I must visit families every now and then, I must clean, I must cook, I do laundry, I can go on for days saying what I have to do since I live alone. I'm responsible for everything. Living alone sucks.

Life was way easier when I had my mum cook for me or do my laundry and take care of the house herself, but now it's such a big responsibility on me to DO EVERYTHING. I wish I could go back in time and start school days all over again. Or I just wish my family were here, or like I was there. I want them with me. I'm sick of being all alone. It's either they come back or I will just get married and have my husband do some of the house work for me. Who am I kidding, men don't do shit, it will be even harder on me.

I'm not the type of person that likes to complain and I am thankful about everything in my life right now but sometimes I just need to take a break from all this for a minute and just not think about anything anymore. Growing up made me realise that life will hit you in the head everyday of your life. I don't even know why when we were all young we wanted to grow up so fast, I really want to be a little girl again. I want a time machine for real. But oh well, that option isn't possible and I am proud of what I have been put through because it made me who I am today and it made me have responsibility in many things, it made me become a man. Yes I might sometimes need someone to help me get through these things, but if this "someone" is not there, I know I can do anything alone with nobody's help. And yes I really am proud of what I turned out to be. 

So yes, living alone might suck so much, but one day it will make you become someone you never thought you would be, someone strong and someone to depend on.